There Is No Turning Back For Us
by Edhiltam
Summary: ! Contains lots of spoilers, you have to read the Secret Ending 1 and 2 before reading this fanfic ! And what if you were here when Rika met V ? Are you going to change his world and protect V ?


'In eternity, where there is no time, nothing can grow. Nothing can become. Nothing changes. So death created time to grow the things that it would kill... And you are reborn but into the same life that you've always been born into. I mean, how many times have we had this conversation, detectives ? Well, who knows ? When you can't remember your lives, you can't change your lives, and that is the terrible and the secret fate of all life. You're trapped... Like a nightmare you keep waking up into.'

\- True Detectives (Season 1 Episode 5)

'Don't be lonely there, don't try to save anyone there... Just live a selfish life, V.'

\- God Seven to V.

...

'But, what if you come into V's life ? Will God Seven changes V's fate ?... lololololol'

...

Quick footsteps echoed throughout the room, sounding loud in her own ears. The clattering noise came to a halt and the woman stopped in front of a magnificent picture.

As she laid her chartreuse eyes on the painting, her tense body relaxed at the view of the stunning sunrise in front of her. One glance at the photograph and all her fears faded away.

This sunrise was a breathtaking display of shiny colors. The shining sun started rising from the sea. Its brilliant rays shined brightly with mighty colours of red and displayed the clouds with endless rays of orange.

The brightness of the photograph invited her to stare at it. She was amazed at the reflection of the sun on the ocean.

As she watched the picture, a warm feeling invaded her body as if the rays of sun warmed her heart.

"Rika... Are you going to stay like this forever like yesterday ? Take a look at the other pictures ! They are truly beautiful !"

Rika still gazed at the picture. She was mesmerized by the sunrise. Sighing, you look at her and walked by her side, staring at the picture again.

You two began to look once again at the photograph after a few minutes until someone called you.

"Excuse me ?"

You turned your head towards the sound and noticed a blue haired guy at your side. When your gaze met, he gave you a sweet smile with a slight touch of shyness which sent an unexpected warmth through your body.

"I noticed you two always come to my exhibition, especially to look at that picture I took."

He talked with a calm and manly voice. On your right, you heard a small cry and glanced at Rika. Her eyes were glinting and she clasped her hands together as she had a charming smile on her face.

"Aren't you the photographer V ?!"

He nodded lightly while smiling, but his eyes were fixed at you. He opened his mouth to say something but quickly closed it again as he concentrated his eyes on you.

"Are you _ ? The one who organizes parties to raise funds ?"

You nodded and smiled at him.

"Yes it's me ! We raise funds for cancer prevention and medical expenses for people in need."

"Is that so ? To be honest, I've always wanted to talk to you. I want to participate at your party."

As you open your mouth to speak, Rika was already speaking about what she thought about V's picture.

"The sun is the mother of all things. This consistent love and warmth, I feel it from all your pieces. Then I stare at your photographs, I feel all of my fears disappear."

As V was listening to her, his brows furrowed slightly. A pain was growing inside his heart and he felt betrayed, used, and alone. As the pain inside him grew faster, warmth began to invade his body but only to make him feel bad. Something was wrong and he knew it. He felt uncomfortable when he listened to this girl even if her worldview was fascinating.

"Do you think that the world will ever come ? A world where all fears are gone and filled with love and warmth, just like when I see your photographs. Do you believe we all can become the sun one day ? Is that what you think when you take these photos ?"

V smiled gently. He was happy to hear someone who could forgot all her worries and anxiety by looking at his photographs but he still felt this sweet yet dangerous pain.

"No, I don't have such profound thoughts when taking the photos. I'm not that great."

Quickly, V's eyes peered at you, his lips shaped into a gentle smile. His cheeks flushed in the a slight pink color.

"Shall we talk about your party over a cup of coffee ?"

Surprised, you froze for a moment but quickly grinned at him.

"I'll be happy to ! I know a really good coffee shop nearby !"

You turned towards your best friend and looked at her with a big smile.

"Do you want to come as well, Rika ?"

There was no life behind her eyes. She continued to stare at him wild-eyed and her head moved slowly towards you. V watched her a little ill at ease. Her breathing was constricted and shallow. Her head moved slowly up and down.

"Yes..."

Suddenly, you feel a touch on your shoulder and looked at V. He extended his hand towards you to shake hands.

"I'm sorry, I forgot to introduce myself, my name is Jihyun. Kim Jihyun."

...

Rika, Jihyun and you were at a coffee shop. Rika was silent all the time while you sipped your coffee with Jihyun besides you.

When he talked to you, you always felt your heart beating faster and faster. His gentle smile was conforting and pleasant and his voice was really soothing.

Still talking to each other about everything and nothing, Rika suddenly talked out loud.

"Do you believe in reincarnation ?"

And it began.

It was uncomfortable having her around. She would start talking extremely loud when you had a conversation with Jihyun.

And it was always the same. Reincarnation, souls, connection between dead people, what happens after death.

You were worried for Rika who was already seeing a psychologist. But this time it was worse. At least, there were times where you could understand her but this time, she was lost in her own world.

Ready to go insane.

...

Entering in her flat, Rika locked the door and put her back on the door. Her body slid lifelessly on the ground. Finally, the party was over for her and she could eventually let her feelings out.

"They are getting married ?..."

Imagine the worst nightmare you've ever had, take a moment to recall it. Then imagine that you were unable to wake up from it because you were already awake.

"No, no, no, no... It can't be... No... V is mine... Our souls are connected... He died for me... Why ?! It's been only one year that they are together... !"

All she can feel was like an extinguished fire. Bright and strong, everything was light with happiness and light. But once that fire was gone, Rika was left with darkness, her mind slowly became overrun by obscurity.

Her love was stolen and nothing could replace it in her heart. When she was around people, she could at least smile, the outside world gave her feelings of joy.

But that joy won't last forever.

When she was alone, obscurity invaded her mind and she was left with the darkness she hid. It was like she was alone, walking in the void. Darkness beside her and nothing else.

Birth and death are an endless loop. Déjà vu isn't something weird or insane, it's when you realize, it is not the first time you are in the loop.

And people who are aware of it have the chance to make new choices and change their future.

Rika knew it. And so did V.

Her breath became heavier and faster than before. She clenched her teeth together as her knuckles became white. Her small body quivered in frustration, her heart was about to explode.

In that silence, she screamed with her whole body. It echoed throughout her room. Her cries were of pain, almost pitiful. She couldn't bear the pain she had for so long.

A few doors next to her flat flew open as they heard Rika screamed and murmurings were heard from outside the door. Some of them even knocked on the door but were only answered by only strident cries.

Rika put her hands on her ears to ignore the outside world but still, she heard people said she was insane. She shook her head as if everything will disappear but she still heard these murmurings.

Tears flowed down her cheeks and she began to sob loudly like a child. Her hands began to quiver intensely. Quickly, she got up and smashed her head against the wall.

She was scared and alone.

She wanted the world to feel the pain she was feeling.

...

"_. I'm sorry that I didn't say until death do us part. Because if I have numberless lifetimes, I want to spend all of them with you beside me."

Jihyun took your hands and gazed at your eyes. He smiled smoothly and kissed you very gently on your lips.

Suddenly, Jumin and Jaehee came beside you, to congratulate you for your wedding. You could notice Yoosung and Rika a little far away from you and you waved at them.

"Rika ! Don't you think _ is pretty ?"

Yoosung pushed the wheelchair slowly towards you until Rika laid her hand on his to stop him. Confused, he went besides her and crouched down.

Staring. That was all she was doing these days. Staring at the people who have a life. She was always gazing at the people, inventing a conversation between them.

'I hate you.'

...

Finally, Rika was in her flat. It was late at night and Yoosung was already asleep on the couch.

Getting up from her bed, she walked slowly towards her desk, turned on her computer and stared at the screen in front of her for a few minutes. Empty eyes, she was staring at the void.

Before Yoosung could hear her, she went on a forum and a crazy smile appeared on her lips.

'You are completely right. I hate people. When I look at them, I'm sure they plotted something against me, to make me suffer. They told me that I'm sick and I need medication but I am not. Today, people laughed at me at school... Because I have my own opinions. We always have to be like the others, like a group of sheep. They told me they are crazy. Again. I have had enough. Help me, please.'

A huge grin appeared on Rika's face. A scary one. Her eyes were glinting with mischief and her heart was beating like crazy. It wasn't the first time she did it. And when they did it. She felt happy, it was like her empty heart was filled again. With blood.

'You are not sick... But I know a really good way to end everything. Those murmurings, your family who think they help you but make you worse, people who look at you and judge you like you were an animal. I know how to finish this.'

She didn't have to wait for an answer.

'Please... Tell me the way ! You are so nice to me ! It's been a few months since you were by my side and all this time I always did what you told me !'

A chuckle resonated in the room.

'Go in your car and lock the doors. Take some bleach and pesticide and mix them together and you will fall in a peaceful sleep. But before that, put a danger sign on the window of your car. I swear, everything will be fine, you can find this really easily.'

'Ok... I'll do it. Thank you for everything ! I owe you my life.'

Hearing Yoosung's body moving in his sleep, Rika quickly turned off her computer and went on her bed.

Looking at the ceiling, she couldn't see a thing. Everything beside her was only darkness. She couldn't hide her smile. She wanted everybody to feel pain and she was willing to do everything for this.

...

"Jihyun ?"

You called your husband while hiding in your blanket. You watched him as he walked towards you and sat on the bed. His hands caressed your cheeks slowly and gently.

"I'm so happy to have met you, _. You are my everything. I love you."

Not expecting that, you hid under the blanket while giggling but quickly, pulled the blanket to look at him. You had a beautiful smile on your face.

"I love you too, Jihyun !"

He slid his body into the blanket and his arms wrapped around you. His warm breath tickled your nape and he laid a kiss on it.

"Do you want to come with me to the mountains tomorrow ?"

"Yes ! I'll be happy to ! It's not everyday that I can be with you while you take pictures ! Why the sudden question ?"

You heard him chuckle.

"I want to photograph you. I am so happy to be with you and I don't know how I should express my happiness."

As you turned your body, you hugged Jihyun really tightly, a small cry of surprise escaped his lips. He chuckled and patted your head with a smoothing smile.

"I know an another way !"

You had a mischievous smile on your lips but even before you could do something, Jihyun pinned you underneath him. His eyes were glinting.

"Now that we are married, I can finally use this way."

You giggled as Jihyun kissed you. It was slow and soft, comforting in a way words couldn't express it. Between kisses, he murmured lightly.

"I love you. Thank you for being my source of happiness."

As you fell asleep, Jihyun kept staring at you with a gentle smile. No more pain was penetrating his heart, instead, there was a warmth growing inside him. He was finally happy.


End file.
